Monday, January 23, 2006

"Who AM I??"

Thats a pretty deep question. And for those who know me... I avoid such questions. But there have been moments when people have told me about this dilemma of theirs.

"Who am I?"
"What IS my religion? My dad follows this... my mom practices that..."

"Is there something wrong with being an atheist?"
"What do my parents want me to follow?"
"What do I want to follow?"
"How do I see what is right for me?"
"When do I see the *light*?"
"I've never been an overly spiritual person. Is it too late to start being one?"

And the questions go on and on. I couldn't answer those Q's (I never will)... but today morning, when I woke up, I couldn't help laughing at what I saw.

Last night, after a long day of Chem, I decided to read one of Vonnegut's books. Instead, I found this book - Light For My Path: Illuminating Selections from the Bible - which I had bought last year when I was going around the bookstore grabbing like a maniac at books on Christianity and Buddhism. Don't ask...

I'd read the Bible in the 7th or 8th grade, when I was in a catholic school for a couple of years. So I started reading the excerpts and it was like vising the old days of sitting in the Chapel and staring at the Cross for hours. So anyway, this morning I woke up, had a quick shower and when I came back to my room, I saw the Bhagavat Gita (thats the Holy book for the Hindus) kept ontop of the Light For My Path.

That's when I laughed. I actually laughed! My first assumption was, "Aw jeez... either mom or dad want me to read the Gita instead of the Bible." (one of those silent parent commands) I went out and casually asked who had placed the book on my table. Turned out to be my dad O_o Though his intentions were good. When I asked him why, he said something like, "Well, I wanted you to read both the books and see the similarities between the two."

No idea, but that made me feel grateful. Really really grateful.

Probably because I was dreading I would hear, "You should be reading this instead of that." Really, what greater fear than your parents (indirectly) wanting you to follow a particular religion. We've all seen it in documetaries and read it in books. It IS a terrible feeling.

I guess I'm neither here or there. And its better that way. I get to pick the things that ring true to me and fit 'em into my life. Not being a very religious person, being told to be who I want to be and having the liberty to choose to do what I want when it came to such matters... is indeed a blessing.

Picture courtesy : La confusion de l'arbre


miles m00ner said...

wow M ... i mean wow lol i love how you preach :P didnt know u were capable of it brat :P~

3ngin33r said...

haha as IF... I've started become a bloggin' reg :\ is that a bad thing? 'cuz I've got all these thoughts! I just wanna type and type and type and take up all the f'ing space I can... hehe

Moi said...

i wudn't know abt religion but i sure did connect with the parents' part in ur blog!i mean, even i ve had instances where my parents have managed to surprise me with their wisdom, and of all the times when i expected them to b last people on earth to understand me!

Lonely Guitar said...

a few typos here n there..



miles m00ner said...

aw course not babe :) i inspired ya after all


LOL @ typos
i'l let ya tell the people the story behind this post :P

3ngin33r said...

I totally agree Moi! I'm not too religious either, but parents acting... well, NOT like parents is something unusual. Thanks for stopping by 'n keep those smileys rolling!

Ah yes Dreamer. Hang around more often and you'll spoile yer engliz tu or... just get used to ignoring a whole lot of what I say.

mwuah, Miles! hehe the story ppl, was simple. I was multi-taking. Eating, blogging, studying Phys, talking to m00ner, a friend online 'n trying something which I'd rather not mention here haha. So much for my reputation as a serious blogger :P

Lonely Guitar said...

I'm used to correcting typos, even in ARES chatrooms :P

So no probs.


Cross said...

I like our 2 minute hallway breakfasts. I definitely can't wait for tomorrow.


3ngin33r said...

ARES chatrooms??

well, looks like you're already used to my typos Dreamer :P

Cross, such are the lives of ppl in the fast-track. we should consider starbucks/subway someday. you pick :) and thanks for the sw33t guestb00k message!

Akhil said...

I'm now going to sound like a Buddha Insaan (Preaching Ole Man), But the Bhagvad Gita isn't the holy book of the hindus. There is, in fact, no holy book of hindus, I'm going by the definition of a holy book as a book which tells how a particular religion came into existance, how a person following that religion must lead his life, and what would happen to a person who doesn't believe in what the book has to say, which usually, isn't something nice.

"Sarvey Bhavantu Sukhinah,
Sarvey Santu Niramayah
Sarvey Bhadrani Pashyantu,
Ma Kaschid Dukh Bhag Bhavet"

Says a shloka from the rig veda. Translated, it says

"May Everyone be happy
May Everyone have long life
May Everyone See Pleasant sights
May no one ever have Sad Fate"

[Damn, Learning Samskrit Came in handy, after three long years]

Everyone, Not "Everyone who believes in Krishna" or whatever, Those guys believed in free will. They did not judge you based on what your beliefs are.

The vedas were the "Hitchhiker's Guide" of the ancient times, they contained all knowledge and wisdom aquired by people at that time, not just about how people should lead their lives, but math, science (we have a verse which, when converted to the SI system, gives the speed of light at about 95% accuracy in a veda, I forgot which), sports, medicine, and other stuff too.

The Bhagvad gita, was supposed to be a very good self improvement guide, no more, no less. But the pundits of the middle ages made the general public believe that it was some previliged information so that they could make money, they also made stuff up, nowhere in any ancient indian text has written anything about sati, or the purdah (purdah, I believe, was muslim tradition, and is written about in quran), heck, not even pre-marital sex is expressly forbidden.

The whole point is that......... Oh great, now I forgot what the whole point was.

3ngin33r said...

Hm, that is true Akhil. Thanks for pointing it out. I think your point was to let us know in short what the Gita (and probably any other Veda) says? That shloka is very interesting indeed. And like you said, the reference to "Everyone" in it was/is for everyone who believed in what they did, regardless of their religion, country, nativity, etc.

So yeah. I could change that line in my post... but your comment wouldn't make sense then :P thanks for stopping by!