"rain on meeeee..."

'tis been raining allll day now - reduced to a drizzle now. Ahh, it was such a relief after the scronching summer heat : Know what... on such days you wish you had someone next to you, with whom you could just watch the rain, fall asleep, wake up to feel 'em next ta you ... or maybe I should just write the next romantic bestseller.

Other than that, I'm doing pretty good with my 'last shot' at shoo-ing away the internet addiction. I still listen to my playist when I wake up first thing in the morn, go to sleep after having heard some song depending on my mood, but it's waaay better than before. Heh, here's me hoping life's finally looking up...

song of the moment - 'Unforgiven' by Metallica
What i've felt
What i've known
Never shined through in what i've shown
Never be
Never see
Won't see what might have been
What i've felt
What i've known
Never shined through in what i've shown
Never free
Never me
So i dub thee unforgiven...

(no relation whatsoever, to my mood - just like the way the chorus is sung - but if you wanna know my mood, it's 'Word Up' by Korn)

Tips To Beat BOREdom : by my sIstEr

Read 'Victoria and the Rogue' by Meg Cabot
Followed by the movie 'Mean Girls'

...

Ack !

Song of the moment : Run by Snow Patrol

Girl talk. Blah.

I recall how one week (in sophmore year of hs) started with a friend calling (again.. its amazing HOW much girls can talk if allowed to) and screaming worse than a hoghorn, "Ich liebe es! Ich liebe es! Ich liebe es!" Now thank God I know she'd been taking german classes, otherwise I would have retorted back lamely with some made-up language (done it before, it was fun). Trying to stay awake, I ask her:

Me - What was that again?
Her - Ich liebe es..
Me - ...
Her - Heh.
Me - Okay.. sounds like your german classes aren't working.
Her - I KNOW what it means, and its right.
Me - Sure. And it means..?
Her - I love it (what a goofball).. how would you know? hehe (jesus, that giggle)
Me - I knew that, but what is that you love?
Her - It. (oh boy, NOW I get the hint that the talk wouldn't get over anywhere close to 2 more hours)
Me - It... (by this point I could remind her - and not politely - to kindly check the clock and call me back after 9am; wasn't an hour at night enough?)
Her - ... you know !
Me - Uh, if you say so. I'm happy for ya; you love it, I'm sure I love it too, we both love 'it', can I go back to my sueño?
Her - Soonio.. ?
Me - Lemme elaborate hmm? *yawn loudly* .. NEEEED sleep, siesta, sonno. Now hun.. *nod off to sleep, not bothering to hang up*

Why did I include that silly convo? No idea. The entire smartass talk RUINED my sleep.. especially when I was only recovering frm insomnia :\ Actually me loves middle of the night calls.. ONLY if ppl have some sympathy for the hour and the woozy condition a sleepy person might be in - and get straight to the point. Or sing me to sleep again, or bore me to sleep.. anything but girl talk, which demands participation and equal levels of "ooohh la la la" energy. Mweh. I guess thats what this rather short entry's about. Girl talk. And how much it pisses me off. All that hypertalk, those words... what a waste.

Oh by the way, this friend wasn't really a friend friend. You know, one of those friends who hardly stay in touch after high school. BUT. That hardly makes a difference. I'm still pretty much disgusted with it all - and I know, it's pretty weird, especially coming from a girl. Hell with it.

fightING temptatIONS

... is so frigging tough grRrRr someone just shoot me

Feel Good Co.

Yup, not Feel Good Inc. (no offense, I LOVE the song by the Gorillaz). This one's another FWD I got quite a while back, and found it lying in my inbox (yeah.. finally cleaning up the damn thing). So here are the tiny things that are worth.. everything unspoken. I got it from one of the FWDs in the email.

Like someone said : Life isn't measured by breaths you take; but by moments that take your breath away...

1. Falling in love.
2. Laughing so hard your face hurts.
3. A hot shower.
4. No lines at the supermarket.
5. A special glance.
6. Getting mail (ok, not bills)
7. Taking a drive on a pretty road.
8. Hearing your favorite song on the radio.
9. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
10. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
11. Chocolate milkshake (or vanilla or strawberry!)
12. A bubble bath.
13. Giggling.
14. A good conversation.
15. The beach.
16. Finding a 20 dollar bill in your coat from last winter.
17. Laughing at yourself.
18. Holding a newborn baby.
19. Midnight phone calls that last for hours.
20. Running through sprinklers.
21. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
22. Having someone tell you that you're beautiful.
23. Laughing at an inside joke.
24. Friends.
25. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.
26. Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
27. Your first kiss (either the very first or with a new partner).
28. Making new friends or spending time with old ones.
29. Playing with a new puppy.
30. Having someone play with your hair.
31. Sweet dreams.
32. Hot chocolate.
33. Road trips with friends.
34. Swinging on swings.
35. Making eye contact with a cute stranger.
36. Making chocolate chip cookies.
37. Having your friends send you homemade cookies.
38. Holding hands with someone you care about.
39. Running into an old friend and realizing that some things (good or bad) never change.
40. Watching the expression on someone's face as they open a much desired present from you.
41. Watching the sunrise.
42. Getting out of bed every morning and being grateful for another beautiful day.
43. Knowing that somebody misses you.
44. Getting a hug from someone you care about deeply.
45. Knowing you've done the right thing, no matter what other people think.

There. Run across a field and feel good. Wow, whata headstart for da day :D

~The End~

Last night of absolute freedom ...


okay, back to cleaning up the house before moi family returns. maybe tomorrow. damn procastination. wait, today.. its midnight. yeah... maybe in the morn (when I wake up one last time to the sound of ... silence - it was getting to me by the way - did that just contradict my dismay over my last night of freedom? maybe, blah).

song of the moment : Tonight and the Rest of My Life by Nina Gordan

Internet Part 2 : Addiction

Frankly speaking, the entire "ok-no-more-internet-for-a-few-days" scene I had going didn't quite go off so well... frm my apparent recent posts (wow, nearly every single day). Also, staying away frm the yahoo!, msn messengers definitely didn't work out. I eventually found out (and not accidentally either) that msn has a web browser, and one can open up their messenger wherever there was an internet connection (and wherever I went..there WAS a computer/laptop.. looking at me in the face, almost treacherously inviting, dammit). I did turn away and tried to focus my attention on kids/babysitting/movies/swimming (as if..). And like on record, it didn't WORK ! I always found time to sit alone and think. Think of things I shouldn't be thinking, or even better, don't like to think about (sounds better heh). For instance, fretting unnecessarily over things you have no control over. It's futile, but you know how paranoid ppl are. They just can't stop thinking... thinking... about the "what-if"s. Oh yeah, the "what-if" is a fav of mine. Makes you feel depressed and further in a shyt-hole. Hm.. that just sounded bad. Okay, I'm gonna give it another shot. One last shot. If this doesn't work (the 'staying' away).. blah with it. Everything happens for a reason (the reason better be good), or I like to think of it thata way. The worst part to all this ? By the end of the day, I really have no clue what I did on the net. Browsed through, listened to the radio, blogged, checked my email, commented on blogs, learnt this tiny bit about web designing... that sounds a lot, but with high-speed internet, that shouldn't take more than 2 hours max. The rest of the 6-8 hrs? No idea.. the computer's idle most of the time, while I'm doing other stuff. That sounds like a good excuse. BUT... THAT is the problem. Leaving the computer on for ..what ? Addiction. That's what it is. Even when I'm sleeping, out for a jog, at the library, it's switched on the entire time. Of course, haven't I got excuses for that too. One, it gives me this sense of 'connection' with the world (friends, fellow bloggers, etc.). Two, the radio's got the latest music on. Three.. just 'cuz. Heh. The power supply blew out quite a number of times in the last week, and really, for the first time in years, I almost felt handicapped without the internet/computer whatever. I couldn't think of anything to do - even if I did, I lost interest in it within a few minutes. It reminded me of what someone had said a long time ago to me. Something like, "We've become so dependent on technology, that we can't think of a life without it." I know I'll have this sentence haunt me at uni too, working/studying around Macs, with buildings operated by computers. And a major perfectly defining it. Maybe that sounds a bit off.. but it's true. Living all by myself, I got a look at my life from the outside. It wasn't very appealing. I still had 4-5 hours with nothing to do. Idle. That's counting the hours after 'quiet time', ' leisure time'. That makes me wonder.. what AM I doing here now? (oi, you're catching up with blogging before heading out. Yeah, right.) Okay, one last shot. Cheers. To me.

Besides all that, I must say MSN's done a helluva job with the spaces. You can add music, lists, hang-out spots, interests, pictures, etc. etc.. And lately, more and more ppl seem to have realized that :) lol and started 'utilizing' it. More bloggers, the better. I think. Blogger addicts? Uhm, maybe not so good. Welcome to the big, wide world of the blogosphere !

Another thing, I've set a record already. I've gone through 3 days of not having talked to anyone on messenger :D uh, bet it's nothing to be proud of (just indicates I'm losing my 'touch'), but hey... for me it IS. It means I can go without messaging ppl and spending time in... talks, which later prove not to be so worthwhile. Yay ! Really, that's a big step in the entire 'detatching' thingy. Okay.. with that, I'm out for today. Trying hard at that one last shot.

Lets make it clear though.. blogging doesn't count :) Wait, what am I detatching frm then ? hm.. oh yeah. Cutting down on the hours. Got it. Later, and thanks for reading 'til here (addict... kidding).

Talk abt Graphic

Saw this movie 'Sin City' ...and uhm, can't say it was one of my favorites. Not that I wasn't warned in the beginning that it was 'graphic', 'yuck', 'sick', 'chilling', ' horrifying', 'definitely not with an adult' by a few friends. I mean really.. who would want to watch :

1. One's celeb crush devouring women alive and sticking up their heads as a "gross way of reminding himself he's acquired another soul" a.k.a. werewolf with quite a disastrous appetite.
2. Body parts being ripped off..

3. Women being called "sexy", and why? Oh 'cuz they can shoot a guy right where it hurts and strut around in barely anything (wait, that IS considered sexah..nevermind)

4. People fighting over a chopped head... eventually, it gets blown into pieces, ugh

5. Blood, blood, blood... ugh

The ultimate "sinful" movie. The comic strips' (the movie's based on a comic book.. imagine that) got quite a handful of sights. Maybe I'll buy one for the heck of it.

It's weird though... when the movie ended, I felt as if it wasn't bad at all (almost to the point that I could watch it again.. cheers to Mr.Rodriguez for that). But through it all, I was thinking, "okay... it should end now... oh no, not anymore..".

Would I recommend it to someone? Sure. One needs to watch such movies once in a while. It's the goriest, fast-paced (or however it's spelt) movie of our generation. So why not..

music m3m3

A music meme. I don't really know how to explain it, but its a huge hit-off in the blogosphere and meant for ppl who just wanna kill time :) aka me at the moment. I forgot who I tagged this from but I went onto this site, typed in my birth year in the Search box and picked the top 100 songs of that year. The whole point is to figure out how many songs you know from that period. I've highlighted the ones I've listened to.

1. Walk Like An Egyptian, Bangles
2. Alone, Heart
3. Shake You Down, Gregory Abbott
4. I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me), Whitney Houston
5. Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now, Starship
6. C'est La Vie, Robbie Nevil
7. Here I Go Again, Whitesnake
8. The Way It Is, Bruce Hornsby and the Range
9. Shakedown, Bob Seger
10. Livin' On A Prayer, Bon Jovi
11. La Bamba, Los Lobos
12. Everybody Have Fun Tonight, Wang Chung
13. Don't Dream It's Over, Crowded House
14. Always, Atlantic Starr
15. With Or Without You, U2
16. Looking For A New Love, Jody Watley
17. Head To Toe, Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam
18. I Think We're Alone Now, Tiffany
19. Mony Mony, Billy Idol
20. At This Moment, Billy Vera and The Beaters
21. Lady In Red, Chris De Burgh
22. Didn't We Almost Have It All, Whitney Houston
23. I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For, U2
24. I Want Your Sex, George Michael
25. Notorious, Duran Duran
26. Only In My Dreams, Debbie Gibson
27. (I've Had) The Time Of My Life, Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes
28. The Next Time I Fall, Peter Cetera and Amy Grant
29. Lean On Me, Club Nouveau
30. Open Your Heart, Madonna
31. Lost In Emotion, Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam
32. (I Just) Died In Your Arms, Cutting Crew
33. Heart And Soul, T'pau
34. You Keep Me Hangin' On, Kim Wilde
35. Keep Your Hands To Yourself, Georgia Satellites
36. I Knew You Were Waiting (For Me), Aretha Franklin and George Michael
37. Control, Janet Jackson
38. Somewhere Out There, Linda Ronstadt and James Ingram
39. U Got The Look, Prince
40. Land Of Confusion, Genesis
41. Jacob's Ladder, Huey Lewis and The News
42. Who's That Girl, Madonna
43. You Got It All, Jets
44. Touch Me (I Want Your Body), Samantha Fox
45. I Just Can't Stop Loving You, Michael Jackson and Siedah Garrett
46. Causing A Commotion, Madonna
47. In Too Deep, Genesis
48. Let's Wait Awhile, Janet Jackson
49. Hip To Be Square, Huey Lewis and the News
50. Will You Still Love Me?, Chicago
51. Little Lies, Fleetwood Mac
52. Luka, Suzanne Vega
53. I Heard A Rumour, Bananarama
54. Don't Mean Nothing, Richard Marx
55. Songbird, Kenny G
56. Carrie, Europe
57. Don't Disturb This Groove, System
58. La Isla Bonita, Madonna
59. Bad, Michael Jackson
60. Sign 'O' The Times, Prince
61. Change Of Heart, Cyndi Lauper
62. Come Go With Me, Expose
63. Can't We Try, Dan Hill
64. To Be A Lover, Billy Idol
65. Mandolin Rain, Bruce Hornsby and the Range
66. Breakout, Swing Out Sister
67. Stand By Me, Ben E. King
68. Tonight, Tonight, Tonight, Genesis
69. Someday, Glass Tiger
70. When Smokey Sings, ABC
71. Casanova, Levert
72. Rhythm Is Gonna Get You, Gloria Estefan and the Miami Sound Machine
73. Rock Steady, Whispers
74. Wanted Dead Or Alive, Bon Jovi
75. Big Time, Peter Gabriel
76. The Finer Things, Steve Winwood
77. Let Me Be The One, Expose
78. Is This Love, Survivor
79. Diamonds, Herb Alpert
80. Point Of No Return, Expose
81. Big Love, Fleetwood Mac
82. Midnight Blue, Lou Gramm
83. Something So Strong, Crowded House
84. Heat Of The Night, Bryan Adams
85. Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You, Glenn Medeiros
86. Brilliant Disguise, Bruce Springsteen
87. Just To See Her, Smokey Robinson
88. Who Will You Run Too, Heart
89. Respect Yourself, Bruce Willis
90. Cross My Broken Heart, Jets
91. Victory, Kool and The Gang
92. Don't Get Me Wrong, Pretenders
93. Doing It All For My Baby, Huey Lewis and The News
94. Right On Track, Breakfast Club
95. Ballerina Girl, Lionel Richie
96. Meet Me Half Way, Kenny Loggins
97. I've Been In Love Before, Cutting Crew
98. (You Gotta) Fight For Your Right To Party, Beastie Boys
99. Funkytown, Pseudo Echo
100. Love You Down, Ready For The World

Well, that was bad lol .. I'm definitely not in sync with the yr I was born in.

I also did this 'Blogger Code' thing. Answered the Qs, and here's what my code read...

B3 d- t k- s- u-- f- i- o x-- l- c--

NO idea what that means, but hell. Was worth a try.

Federer Vs. Roddick

i SO wanna watch the match... wish i could :( not on TV...

oh well, guess visiting families and getting to watch kids splash around in the pool is goo' enough. talk abt a perfect "family" day... hm, with another family (not mine).

*sigh* now i wish i were at home... chilling out, watching a movie and tlking with friends... ahh, what a thought. but on another note, that wouldn't quite pan out. the electricity blew out in our area 'cuz of a thunderstorm, which hardly lasted for 15 mins.

anyway. kids are nice... i guess. babysitting isn't though. god bless me..

does anyone even read this crap? blah, i hope not. don't really want ppl ta know-know, you know. um, that made sense :)

Another event I wouldn't wanna miss? Evita - the musical (though it's in Sept). Here's more about it :

Winner of seven Tony Awards®, EVITA brings to life the dynamic, larger-than-life persona of Eva Perón, wife of former Argentine dictator Juan Perón. Eva Perón, blessed with charisma, captivated a nation by championing the working class. The exuberant Latin, pop and jazz influences create a gripping theatrical experience as told through a compelling score by Andrew Lloyd Webber. One of the most popular collaborations between Webber and Tim Rice, this legendary musical features the memorable songs ‘Night Of A Thousand Stars’, ‘Another Suitcase In Another Hall’, ‘Rainbow Tour’, ‘High Flying, Adored’, and ‘Don't Cry for Me Argentina’.

anyway, me's out.

Tenn!s !n th3 Ra!n (uhm, not really...)

To be updated soon (after the match, that is) ... thank you :)

~after the match~

Okay... ALL the 3 matches we watched were amazing ! (thank god we didn't have a downpour we'd been having all night) This was the ATP Masters, and we watched a doubles match between Black/Ullyett and Paes/Zimonjic, singles between Safin/Ginepri and Federer/Acasuso... need I say more? The Safin/Ginepri match was rather disappointing - it ended in almost an hr (not even 60 mins), and worst ... Safin lost :( Acasuso didn't really have a chance against Federer - poor guy was exhausted by the end of the second set. Wish I could have stayed back to watch Hewitt against Roddick, but I think the summer sun took it's toll on me and my friend, so we had to scurry off ta the comforts of our homes... 91 degrees! And the worst humidity our city's had this summer (and it all had to occur today). Gotta love umbrellas/hats and sunscreen. Lasted us the entire 9 hrs :D

Song of the moment : You and Me by Lifehouse

Saddest Song Eva...

"The Trapeze Swinger" by Iron and Wine (In Good Company Soundtrack)

oh Beautiful Day ...

It's one of those "walk in the park" days, when you just don't feel like getting outta bed in the morn. Atleast I didn't. I must have woken up 4 times, and gone back ta sleep on all occasions, thinking "okay... 10 more minutes...". Finally I had to wake up when a friend called at 10a.m.. A walk along the lake was a must, and I'm glad I did. It was the perfect way to cure my dragging cold somehow. I just sneezed twice today, compared to .. many on the other days.

Here's the song for today : You're A God by Vertical Horizon. I heard it after ages yesterday and it's stuck 'til this oh-so-beautiful day...

e-Mode

Let's make this clear that I'm thoroughly bored.
I would never (N-E-V-E-R) do this but yeah... like I said, me is bored.
So anyway, I used to absolutely love this site (you answer questions etc.) and most of my spare time was spent here, actually shaking my head at how it"described" my likes and stuff. Today, after almost a year after staying away from the site, I decided to look at all my test results. Here's some of the musings the site came up for me.

Must-See European City : London
(uhm... when I looked at the other options, I wondered how come I didn't get Prague. I LOVE that city, and would do anything to get that answer... grr)




Zodiac Match Test : Cancer
(no offense, but lets get real. Cancerians are so... so, what's the word - unnecessarily emotional. I adore emotions, but not when that's what you have to face 24/7; love romantics at heart - which woman doesn't - but.. nah. Not an over-drive)


Signature City : Seattle
(NOW we're talking)






Fantasy Island : New Zealand
(I'd agree too... but I barely have any knowledge of the place)





Man of Your Dreams : A Secret Agent
(er... yeah, don't ask - I'm just hoping we're talking the Banderas-type agents)






Your Trademark Tune : (You Drive Me) Crazy - Spears
(compared to the other songs... I'm just glad I got this one)





Celebrity Soul-Mate : Owen Wilson
(................................... oh my... did I mention that I just love this site?)






Which That 70s Show character are you : Kelso
(hmm..... for what? my humor ? jeez I sure hope not - no offense to him, but 'i' isn't 'him')






Movie Star double : Drew Barrymore
(The reason - A free spirit like you needs to be played by someone who knows what it's like to carve out her own niche. Um... thatd too deep for me anyway)



What does your style say about you : Sporty and fun
(yup, thats just me - finally something that makes sense)





Which 'Friend' are you : Monica
(LOL ... atleast I know I'm not the only one editing for grammar mistakes in the middle of reading my own compliments)




My 'true' talent : Abstract Reasoning
(You're one of those rare people who can mix two unrelated ideas together to come up with a great new one. Your combination of strategic thinking and creativity can be an incredible value in both business and social environments. Oh wow, the way they put your worst trait in such a manner it makes you shine your teeth outta your mouf)


There's loads more, but I just found something to do - vile away time in short. Yay! Happy e-moding, blogging, etc. etc. - all those good things. One more thing ta do on boring days :)

And Happy Independence Day ta all my Indie friends *huggssss*

FeTT's VeTTe

~click here to listen~
My backpack's got jets
I'm boba the fett
I bounty hunt for jaba hut
To finance my vette
I chill in deep space
A mask is over my face
I deliver the prize but I still narrow my eyes
Cuz my time I don't like to waste.
Get down

*cheers* animeFrEaK

How Simple Synonyms Mean So Much

When you're Hurt ...
injury, harm, trauma, distress, suffering, detriment, damage, harm, scathe, ache, smart, pain, anguish, wound, bruise, offend, spite, weakened

It invokes Anger ...
rage, fury, ire, wrath, resentment, indignation, enrage, incense, infuriate, madden, provoke, bristle, burn, explode, flare, foam, fume, rage, seethe, steam

With the anger turning to Disgust ...
nauseate, repel, revolt, sicken

As you try to find Reason ...
intuition, understanding, judgement, basis, foundation, justification, warrant, rationale,logic, sense, lucidity, mind, sanity, soundness

For all the Unjust things done to you ...
unfair, inequitable, unequal

And sort all the Lies told earlier ...
canard, cock-and-bull, flasehood, flasity, fib, fiction, inveracity, misrepresentation, misstatement, prevarication, story, tale, untruth, whopper, fish story, tall tale

About Affection ...
attachment, devotion, fondness, liking, love, tenderness, heart, warm-heartedness

About caring for other's Feelings before your own ...
feel, touch, tacticilty, sensation, sensibility, awareness, attitude, sentiment, affection, emotion, belief, conviction, idea, mind, notion, opinion, persuasion, position, view, air, ambience, aura, tone, spirit

You discover You ...
And learn to speak up for what you feel.
Learn to respect your feelings.
Discover a whole new you.

live your best life

I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know hot to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

-Mary Oliver, from "The Summer Day"

Human Clay

With arms wide open

Under the sunlight

Welcome to this place

I'll show you everything

With arms wide open

Now everything has changed

I'll show you love

I'll show you everything

With arms wide open

Augosto Song

It's called Love Song by 311 and by far the best background music I've ever heard. And relaxing. From the movie 50 First Dates.
... Reminds me of people *sigh* who would have liked the song too, but anyway. T'is an awesome song.

Annnnnnnnnnddd a big BIG hug ta Deb :) you made my day, and I couldn't luv ya more than now hehe, happy friendship's day ta ya too *huggggggsssssssss*